Reset Forty-Three, Day Thirty-Three
Sep. 9th, 2022 04:51 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
rejectomorphThursday turned out to be survivable, and since Friday will be almost a rerun of Thursday, it too must be survivable. I could do with less stress and anxiety, but since those are not characteristic of the days but of me myself, they won't get fixed even when Saturday comes along. Saturday's high will be a good fifteen degrees lower than Thursday's or Fridays, it should be highly survivable. There's always the possibility that a much less hot day will improve my mood enough to reduce my stress and anxiety, but I wouldn't count on it. In short, I will probably survive, but I probably won't recover.
What I will probably do instead is go shopping at some point in the next few days. That will bring something resembling recovery, but since the things I buy somehow get consumed and thus need to be replaced yet again, it will not be a true recovery, but merely a postponement of the inevitable, the knowledge of which is the source of the stress and anxiety, so it starts all over again. This is called the circle of life.
There is supposed to be a parable about it in the form of a movie with a lion cub in it or something, but I've never seen the movie so I don't know how it ends. No spoilers, please, but I assume the lion grows up and eats somebody, and it's probably me. That too is rather stressful, but it would also be likely to solve my problems once and for all. Maybe I should make an effort to see that movie, but I don't think I could stand the disappointment if it turns out not to be me, so I don't.
So, as you can see, it is all my own fault, since it's obvious that the lion can't come here and eat me. There are rules about lions coming into the mini-metropolis. It's just not allowed. This means I'll have to go on shopping every few weeks, and be unhappy about it. My shame and guilt are boundless. I think I'll just go cry myself to sleep. But first, chocolate. It's not yet entirely gone.
What I will probably do instead is go shopping at some point in the next few days. That will bring something resembling recovery, but since the things I buy somehow get consumed and thus need to be replaced yet again, it will not be a true recovery, but merely a postponement of the inevitable, the knowledge of which is the source of the stress and anxiety, so it starts all over again. This is called the circle of life.
There is supposed to be a parable about it in the form of a movie with a lion cub in it or something, but I've never seen the movie so I don't know how it ends. No spoilers, please, but I assume the lion grows up and eats somebody, and it's probably me. That too is rather stressful, but it would also be likely to solve my problems once and for all. Maybe I should make an effort to see that movie, but I don't think I could stand the disappointment if it turns out not to be me, so I don't.
So, as you can see, it is all my own fault, since it's obvious that the lion can't come here and eat me. There are rules about lions coming into the mini-metropolis. It's just not allowed. This means I'll have to go on shopping every few weeks, and be unhappy about it. My shame and guilt are boundless. I think I'll just go cry myself to sleep. But first, chocolate. It's not yet entirely gone.
