Running Down

The afternoon medication wore off before midnight. It was like waking up to find reality worse than a nightmare. I felt both as though I'd been beaten about the head and as though I'd come down with influenza. I was also exhausted, having had no more than five hours sleep the day before. I don't want to overdo the ibuprofen, wanting to save it for bedtime, so I took an aspirin. It did little. After a fitful nap, I endured a few hours of worsening agony. I downed the Advil a few minutes ago. I hope it takes effect soon. I need that sleep.

Thinking back over the most miserable times in my life, I'd say the current time ranks about #6. If it continues like this for a couple more days, it will move up the ranks even without worsening.

So, my bones have defeated me. My spirit has been beaten to a pulp. I'm going to have to cut back even more on my time at the computer, and especially the time using the keyboard. The position in which I have to put my arms and my head in order to use it greatly intensifies the pain in everything above my shoulders within three minutes. I'm screwed.

Other than that, a nice night.

I am, however, wondering what has brought about so many deletions in July:

cataract?

nealok?

jproulx?

saltdog?

Disturbing, and the month not yet over. Hey, maybe I am having a nightmare, and will soon wake to find everything as it was.

What a pleasant lie to tell myself as I try to fall asleep.

Stuff Warmed Over

Spider under my window sill is gone. I've been so distracted I didn't notice when she left. Maybe she was another heat related casualty. Maybe she dropped to the floor and her tiny cadaver is now becoming part of the baseboard dust behind the desk. I don't like to think about what's behind the furniture. I don't like to think about what's in the air.

Advil before bed didn't work very well. I managed only a bit over two hours of sleep before being wakened by head pain. Ice application followed, leading to another two hours of sleep, interrupted two or three times so it was spread out over three hours. There were dreams of some sort, or maybe just fever hallucinations, but the memory of them is so vague I can't say for sure what they were about. I didn't like them, though.

Sun-brightened or shadow-dark, green dominates my view. At the moment, I'm not finding it very restful. My eyes have grown terribly sensitive to glare. More disturbing is the cobweb I've not yet cleaned from the outside of my window. It's full of dead insects, moths predominating. I think I'll go sweep those down right now. Then another pill and more ice. I need this to be over soon.